A large part of my choice to undergo this world trip has been about self reflection. I wanted a chance to test myself, go out of my normal boundaries, and learn about new sides of my personality while bettering other parts along the way. On a not so deep level i also went on this trip just because I love to travel and see new things and I was tired of having a job to go to everyday and paying rent. Most of the trip is amazing fun- new places, new food, and memories that will last me a lifetime. I feel so fortunate and proud that we worked so hard to make this happen for ourselves.
However, as Brad discussed in an earlier blog there is also the downside to traveling and there are sometimes "lows" too. Even though I don't usually know what day it is and Monday is no different than Friday I still occasionally wake up in a funk for no particular reason. Sometimes I really miss my temperpedic pillow, high thread count sheets, and blow drying my hair. Bartering over tuk tuk fares gets old and I have brief moments where I would trade my shoes for a block of Havarti cheese. I often do not understand what people are trying to tell me- i just smile and nod. No one ever mentions while they are lying on the beach in their bikini that it actually takes two trains, a bus, and a ferry to get there. The emotion I find myself struggling with the most on this trip is patience (please, hide your surprise I know this is a shock for many of you).
We tried to book our bus ticket to Cambodia yesterday- a tuk tuk ride and two sky trains later we found out we missed the bus station attendant by 10 minutes. Well, why wouldn't they close at the arbitrary time of 4:30? So today we woke up knowing we had to get our Visa for Cambodia and try again to get our bus ticket along with a new memory card for my camera. With no phone and no computer we navigated using the trusty iPod touch to figure out where we were going. Underground metro transfer to sky train and take a tuk tuk the rest of the way to the Cambodian embassy. Forty five minutes later (10:45am) we arrived and I figured it would take no longer than an hour at the embassy. Wrong. The woman at the counter motions to a sign- visas done at 4pm. No no this isn't going to work for me. I try to explain I need it sooner I had things to do but she just points to the sign again. Since I was not going to have a repeat train station episode of missing the attendant Brad and I conferred and decided to take a taxi to the train station and then back again to the embassy. We bartered with a taxi and finally gave in to a ridiculous price for the round trip. Bangkok is a huge spread out city and when we finally got to the station we promised to be back in five minutes. Wrong- the woman selling the bus ticket was now at lunch. Damn! We tried to explain we had a waiting cab driver but were met with the same response, "eating." More explaining, smiles, then "eating." We waited for about ten minutes until the frustrated cab driver came in and after promising him more money he went back outside to continue waiting. Suddenly the attendant appeared, cutting her lunch short to help us with a smile, and tickets in hand we counted our blessings and took off for the embassy. One crisis averted. When we arrived back we decided to kill time and grab lunch. All the sudden I felt something in my shoe- oil! Somehow I had stepped in a mud/oil puddle and it was all over my Birkenstock and foot. I felt a rage beginning to consume my body- this day was not fun. I wanted my visa pronto, a clean foot, lunch, and air conditioning back at the hotel! Fuck this 100 degree weather and stupid tuk tuks and running all over Bangkok! I muttered a few curses, took a deep breath, and found a cafe with frozen orange shakes. They had "wipeout" on TV and after cleaning my shoe I found myself laughing. I had found air conditioning and the world seemed a little brighter. After lunch we even found a store on that street with one of the best presents I have bought so far.
We went back to the embassy around 2:00 and the visas still weren't done. Rather than getting frustrated I posted up with my travelers magazine and became engrossed. I did some people watching, making up stories about the various people in the embassy and where they were going. I asked Brad random questions and took time to just sit and think. Sitting there patiently I came to a stunning realization- i would rather be waiting at this embassy in Bangkok than waiting to go to work back home. Without the anger caused by frustration or anxiety I was able to see it so clearly. All of the sudden it was 4:00 and we had our visa in hand and were headed back to the hotel (using the meter on the taxi this time). I even managed to find a memory card and some delightful street food snacks when we got back near the hotel.
My lack of patience is often caused by a lack of control. This trip is not just a vacation but rather a real life experience and I need to expect not all days will be filled with joy. Instead the stressful or mundane ones can help me to further appreciate the days that are fun filled. As I embark upon this eight hour bus adventure to Siem Reap tomorrow I am going to try to maintain this acceptance of patience and understanding knowing something better waits around the bend. Wish me luck!
Even though those of you reading this blog may not be on a trip you are still embarking on your own type of adventure. Remember that even on the most frustrating and mundane of days a little beauty still lingers, waiting for you to find it. I wish you much patience and love and don't forget to find the time to just...be.
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